Small Circle, Big Circle, No Circle

Hi guys, this is Ejay…. Todays’ post is about circles i.e. Friendship Circles.

I spent more time at church this week than I normally would, and something I learnt, something that resonated with me is that “Apples will rot at their core, when they are stored next to other vegetables”….. this one really stuck because I could relate, you see, I buy a lot of apples and I store them with lettuce, cucumbers and other vegetables in the ‘vegetable section” of my fridge….. and in all honesty, when they go bad, my apples always rot at the core… I would have started eating them before I realise that they are bad…. Yuck right? lol

What’s the moral of the story ?

Growing up, we tend to build a network/Web of individuals linked or isolated, some of these people become friends, others are  just ‘people we know’ and others transition from ‘Friends’ to “people we know”. Now, each individual has a personality that is peculiar to them. Understanding this makes managing a large network of friends easy….

We've got the hang out friends i.e. strictly for good company, the ones that you go to church with, the ones that you call to gossip about boys, the ones that exist solely for IG pics and Lagos Glam events and we've got the ones we can call at 2am on a week night after not talking to them for three (3) years and they will listen to us rant and even offer a helping hand If need be….These people are this way for one of the following reasons;

1.       That’s just who they are, it’s not specific to you; or

2.       It’s actually particularly specific to you

I’m sorry I digressed.

What I was trying to say is, some people (especially the ones you least expect) are like vegetables to you (the apple). Some people unknowingly talk you down, they do not encourage your endeavors, they have never offered to support your business, they will never pay for lunch or even give you toll gate money (you know when you are driving and approaching the toll gate, you will still be the one scrambling for toll gate money)…. Some just don’t want you to succeed, because your success is a threat to them or they just don’t think you are good enough (because they are looking at you with SS1 eye). They judge your ability to succeed on your past or their perspective…. They are simply incapable of believing in you......
Again, these people are this way for one of the following reasons;

1.       That’s just who they are, it’s not specific to you; or

2.       It’s actually particularly specific to you

Only Rule: You do not need that negativity in your life, you need friends that can and will genuinely say to you: “I am not Jealous of you, I am not in competition with you, I will cry with you and I will rejoice with you, I am content with what I have and in who I am, your drive inspires me to be better….. “ .

You need friends that define a support system, friends that encourage you to be better, not the ones that are walking in your shadows/steps, living off the “idea of being your friend”… if you buy a, they wanna buy a too, just because you have it.

I am not asking you to evaluate your circle, I am asking you to ‘know’ your circle. Identify, Assess and Design…. Just know your circle….

Xoxo

Ejay