Timmyz Tales- Three Friends and a Baby

I am sorry , I haven’t written anything in a while, It’s been an eventful couple of weeks.

A few updates:

•  Lunch with Folarin is now a thing, we are kinda like besties now but in an awkward careful way
• Fela and I are in a strange yet good place
•  My best”ish” friend Omonigho visited Lagos from England and she had to stay with me for a week. Omonighos trip cost me money and a dent in my relationship with Fela

Igho and I have known each other all our lives, she is mostly a bitch but she is the only person I can have an honest conversation with. She thinks Folarin and I are a match made in heaven and she thinks Fela is too good to be true, in that vein she “pressured” me into doing two things.

1.  She made me ask Folarin about his family. Me, the mistress of minding her business. I have never asked Folarin about his family and that’s cos I don’t want to make our interactions any more awkward. Igho, however has no problem ranting off about other people’s lives, the first day she met Folarin, less than 10 minutes into the conversation she goes “ Ahn Oga Fola, where is your ring?” (I noticed he stopped wearing his ring about 8 months ago but I never asked.) Folarin laughed it off and didn’t really give a response. *Side eye*..that got me concerned.  After she left, I asked about it and he said “Timi if you really don’t want to know, don’t ask out of courtesy”, In typical Timmy Fashion, I let it go .
2. She also, made me ask Fela about the phone call that I never ever ever wanted to hear of again. Fela and I were in a good place. We had moved on from it. We just did not talk about it. There was no need. Everything with Fela and I checked out, there was absolutely no need for Drama – what you don’t know won’t kill you- right?.

Speaking of Fela, his company asked him to relocate to Lagos and the relocation allowance was like my annual salary multiplied by three. We found the house together, I chose the theme, the colours the furniture, most of the art for the feature wall. It was like I was moving into my own house. I had the keys to the house, I interviewed the cleaning lady, the cook, everything.

Igho does this thing where she makes your life miserable by spiting you via words and action until you do what she wants you to do. So  we can’t have a conversation without her bringing up the call issue, I was beginning to regret why I told her in the first place. Igho met Fela and she liked him but she said to me “Timi, something is not right”. Typical Igho.

One fine morning, we (Fela and I) were getting ready to go to work, he was in the shower, I was applying my make up and we were talking about dinner the day before. Then his phone went off and it was that same ring tone “I love my baby………………. I love my baby….”. “My heart just started crying” Fela didn’t flinch, I stopped talking we both kind of just waited for the phone to stop ringing and it did, then there was an awkward silence. Less than a minute later “I love my baby….. I love my baby……” I made for the phone and in my head I was like “Fela if you fucking stop me”…. He didn’t. I grabbed the phone took a quick glance at the name and face and handed it to him as he wrapped his towel around his body. Again, Fela stepped out of the room to take the call.
Two things: The picture of the person calling was a little baby and the number was an American number. What the hell is Fela doing?

That evening, after a conversation filled with spiteful encouragement from Igho. I gave him a call (facetime, so I could see his face) and I asked him, I said “Fela please who is Etta that you love so much that you have to attach that ringtone to her”.

Fela: Babe

Me: Please, don’t babe me, if you have a girlfriend or wife sitting somewhere, why are you wasting my time

 Fela: Babe

Me: don’t freaking babe me, Fela

Fela; well, If you let me complete the sentence, you’d know it doesn’t end at babe

I was quiet and quite irritated, he brought his phone out of his pocket and showed me pictures of a baby, the same one from earlier

Fela: I have a daughter, Alice, she is 2 years and 6 months and she lives with her mother in the U.S. Her mother’s name is Henrietta hence, Etta. She calls me when something needs to be paid or Alice has been uneasy

I was so shattered.  How is it that I’ve been with this Man for 6 months and he never felt the need to mention that he had a Kid

Me: Fela, this girls mother, is she your wife

Fela: NO

Me; Is she your Fiancee or girlfriend

Fela: No babe, she is the mother of my child and that’s it

Me; Fela so, the mother of your child is the one you attached ringtone to, and you are telling me that’s it.

He went on to explain that, he never changed the ringtone after their relationship went sour

Me: Fela, I’ve known you for 6 months, If I’m right, your relationship has been sour for at least 6 months so please how is it that you haven’t changed that ringtone

Fela: I’d change it

I simply could not sleep in his house that day, I jeje took a taxi home. When I got home there was no light and no water. For a minute, I considered going back to Felas place but God Forbid. How much more do I not know about him?

Funny thing; Fela did not try to stop me, when I said I would go home and not to his place, he said, "I understand" 

Please, what does that mean?

My name is Timmy and aaaaaaaaargh (that's how I feel)

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